Relationships can be challenging. It can be difficult to prevent life’s stressors from impacting your relationship with your partner. During hard times, couples may feel isolated or even hostile towards each other when they most would like to be able to support and uplift their partners. A healthy, resilient relationship takes time, effort, and intention from both partners to cultivate. If you are experiencing any of the following issues in your relationship, and you and your partner would both like to work to improve the relationship, you may want to seek couples therapy:
Feeling that your partner is not understanding you, or other communication issues
Having the same fight over and over
Infidelity, betrayal, or other breaches of trust
Differences between partners in preferred emotional or physical intimacy
Life transitions (i.e. marriage, career change, moving)
Parenting and family issues
Individual issues affecting the relationship (i.e. trauma, depression, substance use)
We offer several evidence-based therapies that specifically address relationship issues:
Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy
Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy (IBCT) is an evidence-based therapy that combines acceptance-based strategies with positive behavioral changes for improved outcomes within couples. In practice, that means working on improving your communication skills, cultivating intimacy in your relationship, and helping you feel like a team again, while also learning to honor and accept each other as you are. IBCT is designed to focus on the here and now, as it centers on the most pressing issues to identify underlying patterns that are contributing to a couple’s distress. This includes identifying and altering negative patterns of thinking. IBCT can also include skills to manage difficult emotions and solve problems. Studies show that more than two-thirds of couples in IBCT not only remain together but also see significant improvements both immediately following therapy and for up to two years post therapy.
The Gottman Method
The Gottman Method is an evidence-based therapy that aims to reframe how you and your partner view and approach conflict. Through decades of research, Drs. John and Julie Gottman discovered that over two-thirds of relationship conflicts are due to differences in perception. Because of this, the Gottman Method prioritizes managing conflict over resolving conflict. This perspective shift avoids argument gridlock and allows you and your partner to reconnect with your love for each other. The Gottman Method strives to improve three key areas of your relationship to restore your connection: 1) address and disarm conflict productively; 2) deepen intimacy, respect, and affection; and 3) build a shared life full of empathy, understanding, and meaning. This treatment provides practical relationship tools and exercises that empower couples to work on these goals in their relationship. Some examples of these tools include learning to speak assertively instead of critically, take responsibility instead of getting defensive, and show gratitude instead of contempt.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is an evidence-based therapy that centers on breaking unhelpful cycles between partners and strengthening connections to increase relationship satisfaction. This short-term, attachment-based therapy aims to create a more secure bond to lead to a healthier, more empathic relationship. With the help of your therapist, you and your partner will identify the patterns and points of disconnection that harm your relationship, often through a cycle of denial and withdrawal. Understanding these will allow you to restore closeness with your partner as you each increase your emotional vulnerability, availability, compassion, and engagement. Fostering this deeper, stronger connection will enable you and your partner to tackle life’s problems together with confidence.
Which Form Of Couples Therapy is the Best?
Comparative research has shown that these therapies are equally effective. The focus when choosing an intervention is on fit with the client or couple. Our therapists often integrate aspects of more than one of these evidence-based treatments to best match the needs of the couple.